The US Defense Department's has created an Office of Strategic Influence, to help improve the United States' image abroad. Some initiatives the OSI will be pursuing:

• US will renounce policy of unilateralism and instead adopt a policy of monolateralism


• Friendly nations eligible to join the "Axis of Awesome!"


• Hollywood will be pressured to withhold "Super Troopers" from overseas release.


• Fliers reading "USA: You Gotta Love It!" will be dropped over hostile nations.


• For each UN vote, one nation, chosen at random from those who vote in accordance with the United States, will receive a Nintendo GameCube.


• Bush will soon be sending out Evites concerning a bowling and karaoke party the US is organizing for Saturday, March 2nd.


• Vice President will send card, small gift to each nation on it's birthday.


• All overseas McDonalds will offer free Super Sizing for a week.


• NBC will devote three minutes of every hour of Olympics coverage to non-US competitors.


• US will create humorous, snarky weblog and urge other nations to "come check it out!"