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Sex Appeal

Whoa, did you see that chick, the one dressed all in black? She was totally checking me out. No, seriously. She kept looking at me from across the room, and then I would make eye contact and she'd look away, but a few seconds later she'd totally look at me again. I kept waiting for her to come over to our table and chat but maybe she's into the long-distance thing. And I guess she was busy presiding and stuff.

She was hot, though. I love strong women, and she seemed really, you know, "authoritative". It was cool the way she keep telling people what the could and couldn't do. Like when you said "I object" and she was all like "Overruled!" That was a total turn on. Power, baby, power. When she walked into the room and that one guy said "all rise," I was, like, "yeah, I'm all rising, if you know what I mean!" Hah hah!

She wanted me, I could tell. At first she was acting all uninterested, but after she told me to stand up and everyone was looking at the jury while they read their verdicts, she was giving me that "oh, you bad boy" look. And I don't mean "bad" in the sense of robbing a Taco Bell -- which I didn't do, by the way -- but bad in the sense of "baaaaaad!" You know what I'm saying.

Maybe the bailiff knows her number. I'm gonna ask him. Remanded? What the hell does that mean? Well, maybe you could ask the bailiff for me, that would be cool.

Aw man, you wanna discuss a possible appeal right now? Jeeze, I dunno. If I appealed, would we get Judge Hottie again? Because, if so, I'm like so there.

Posted on January 14, 2003 to Storytelling