I just ordered theater tickets over the phone. "Okay," the customer service rep said "Let me get your name."

"Matthew Baldwin."

She clarified: "'Baldwin' like the piano?"

"Yes!" I was ebullient. "Thank you so much for not asking 'like the brothers'!"

"Which brothers?" said she.

I know it's a little early, but: Anonymous Theater Ticket Customer Service Representative, will you be my valentine?