<< Bush To Water Ski Over Shark Tank | Op/Ed >>
Update: The Lockjaws

Hey, remember The Lockjaws? (If not: "Finally, a place where people with lockjaw can meet online!")

Well I just heard some fantastic news! According to an email that's currently circulating, they are now purchasing a home together!!!

What a great country, where a couple of people afflicted with tetanus can meet online, fall in love, and pursue the American Dream.

Posted on May 06, 2003 to Observations


Pedant, ON!

"tetanus", not "tetnus"

Pedant, OFF!

Posted by: Pedant on May 7, 2003 10:43 AM

You sir, are a kindred spirit (or something)... Not many people remember the historic "Jump the Shark" episode. Ah, it brings back memories of a time when obvious-last-minute-media-ploys-for-ratings weren't completely ubiquitous. Sniff, sniff.

Posted by: Francis Skipper on May 7, 2003 1:15 PM

Good for them on the new house. They deserve it.

But let's pray they don't spawn. That would just be cruel.

Posted by: brittney on May 7, 2003 1:23 PM

I think their kid is in the class photo further down the page.......er, Matthew, is there something you're not telling us?

Posted by: Adam on May 7, 2003 1:26 PM

"Not many people remember the historic "Jump the Shark" episode"

Oh come on now! Jumping the shark is so last year. There is even http://www.jumptheshark.com/ for Ra's sake!

Posted by: DrBannow on May 7, 2003 1:51 PM

You have it all wrong, Matt. They are simply a couple of young, married opera singers. Because they are trying to get their first gig, they need to sing whenever possible, so the pictures tend to have them with their mouths open.

And it's good that there is a program to help struggling singers buy homes for their families before the diva years and all the attendant stress.

Posted by: Lost Poke on May 7, 2003 3:07 PM

Unfortunately, somewhere between romance and domestic bliss they flipped themselves horizontally, which must have been very painful.

Posted by: babbaz on May 7, 2003 3:13 PM

I keep imagining these models' disbelief as the photographer kept saying "this is great, just a little bit wider! Wider. Wider!" They must have been like, what the fuck is up with this guy? And now to become internet celebrities for it, and the idiot photographer (not to mention all the ad guys who actually *liked* the photo and decided to use it!) gets off scot-free. It's so sad, I tell you!

Posted by: K on May 7, 2003 3:21 PM

I still find it creepy that they look so much like Donny & Marie.

Posted by: dayment on May 7, 2003 4:27 PM

Lockjaw, Opera Singers, hosts of sentient tongues that require sunlight to survive... all wrong.

No, they're a testament to how great this intarweb technology of ours is. If not for the internet, then the two most physically attractive mentally handicapped people (read: 'tards') wouldn't have met each other at all. But thanks to the WWW, they now have a house where they can eat candy and watch cartoons.

Posted by: Maus on May 7, 2003 10:59 PM

I find it sad that we cannot find more sympathy for people born without lower teeth.

Posted by: BillB on May 8, 2003 8:25 AM

I don't understand I thought it was just a picture of two people with big smiles ... what are you guys talking about? Lockjaw? Buying houses? Huh? And the last post... Bush jumping over a shark tank? I flipped between all the major networks and I didn't see anything about that. Could someone explain to me what is going on? What's the deal with this? Once again ... Huh?

Posted by: Dense on May 8, 2003 11:45 AM

Re.: Posting by 'Dense' above. Oh Wow!

Posted by: Liz on May 10, 2003 11:46 AM