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I just received email with the subjectline:

What's a Money Making Cash Cow?
What the hell, is Laffy Taffy sending spam now too?

Contributor of the best punchline in the comments wins a hug.

Posted on June 05, 2003 to Spam


"I have one word for you son: plastics!"

Posted by: Dean Esmay on June 5, 2003 5:12 PM

"I don't know, what's-a-money-making-cash-cow with you!?"

It sounded even worse in my head, believe me.

Posted by: ColdForged on June 5, 2003 5:31 PM

To get to the other side.

Posted by: Andy on June 5, 2003 5:45 PM

A profit-bull.

Posted by: Meghan on June 5, 2003 6:40 PM

YOU'RE the money making cash cow

Posted by: b.l. on June 5, 2003 7:14 PM

About $7.50 an hour.

Posted by: Lisa on June 5, 2003 8:17 PM

A Moooo-la-naire!!!
I hope I don't have to explain...

(From a true Laffy Taffy fan.)

Posted by: mjcoug on June 5, 2003 8:23 PM


Posted by: Michael Toscano on June 5, 2003 8:41 PM

You wanna make big bucks? Figure out how to enlarge your neighbor's penis...

now hug me, you silly yeti.

(p.s.: great site)

Posted by: cogito on June 5, 2003 9:00 PM

Oo, "A profit-bull" is a pretty good.

Posted by: Matthew on June 5, 2003 9:01 PM

A successful ex-wife

Posted by: James on June 5, 2003 11:59 PM

My vote goes for the "successful ex-wife," by James. Nice one.

Posted by: Jaclyn on June 6, 2003 12:03 AM

A dirty Ho-stein.

(I know. I suck.)

Posted by: Paul on June 6, 2003 12:35 AM

1) A cow-nterfeiter

2) Moo-nicipal bonds

3) Hugh Heifer

4) The Federal Res-Hereford

5) Andrew Carne-gie

Posted by: Yet another goddamn Matt on June 6, 2003 2:01 AM

Ice Cream doesn't have bones!!!!!

Posted by: Ben on June 6, 2003 4:56 AM

- A cow-pitalist

- A bottom-line bovine

- A milker bilker

- A Fort Knox ox

- A no-net-lossy bossy

- A lucred moo curd souk herd

OK, I think that's about enough. I'm going to go read a cereal box now.

Posted by: Jerry on June 6, 2003 5:11 AM

An excuse to make udderly terrible jokes.

Posted by: KOTWF on June 6, 2003 6:00 AM

the cow you bought for your bestiality movies.

not that...i know...how much bestiality movies make...mind you...

Posted by: discourageo on June 6, 2003 6:27 AM

Twenty bucks, same as in town.

Posted by: K. on June 6, 2003 6:41 AM

I don't know, but they'll milk you for everything you've got.

Posted by: Nature's Milk on June 6, 2003 6:48 AM

Slightly redundant?

Posted by: Earl on June 6, 2003 7:14 AM

Why invest in the cash cow when you can get the milk for free?

If I win do I get one big hug spread over 20 years or can I take the half-hug payoff now?

Posted by: Duane on June 6, 2003 8:16 AM

Excuse me..I think I'm going to be sick...HURK!!

Posted by: Dave Beefoven on June 6, 2003 8:27 AM

One that ate your wallet.

Posted by: j on June 6, 2003 8:34 AM

Anna Nicole.

Posted by: Larry on June 6, 2003 8:44 AM

Why, a dollar bull, of course!!!

Or Anna Nicole Smith. Both work... ;)

Posted by: Laurie on June 6, 2003 9:24 AM

Isn't this the answer to a Jeopardy question?

"This is a nonsensical title to a typical spam message that will be responded to by people in trailer parks with IQs lower than 75"

What is "What's a Money Making Cash Cow?" Alex.

Posted by: Ryan Waddell on June 6, 2003 12:28 PM

I should be given that hug for not contributing to this discussion.

Seriously. They were rotten. You owe me.

Posted by: brittney on June 6, 2003 12:44 PM

your mom

(that's for you Darren)

Posted by: ted on June 6, 2003 12:53 PM

We asked Jeeves and he told us the answer was Enron.

Posted by: Kim and Kelli on June 7, 2003 8:08 AM

wouldnt you like to know?
what ISNT a money making cash cow?
a pinata!

Posted by: nemoy on June 7, 2003 2:47 PM

ahh, who wants a hug from you anyways?

Posted by: blah on June 7, 2003 7:13 PM

Martha Stewart...

Posted by: Micahweedy on June 10, 2003 11:39 AM

i think martha stewart was the best answer. that should get 2 hugs.

Posted by: Laura on July 16, 2003 5:58 PM

Your momma's a money making cash cow!

Posted by: iggy on November 16, 2003 7:55 AM