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Conan The Total Recall Governator

A few readers have written to ask why I haven't done The Bad Review Revue for Gigli, or commented on the whole Arnold Schwarzenegger thing. C'mon, folks: some jokes are just too easy. Seriously, why should I handpick bad reviews for Gigli when you can just check out the Metacritic page for it? And I think every possible Schwarzenegger / Governor pun has already been made by the cable news anchors. "Actor Arnold Schwarzenegger announced his intention to Jingle All The Way ... to the Governor's mansion!"

One thing I did hear while watching MSNBC at the gym, though. Some commentator was talking about Schwarzenegger and said "His fans know him best as The Terminator, the alien with an Austrian accent." What the --?! THE TERMINATOR WAS A ROBOT NOT AN ALIEN YOU MORON!!! In the wake of the New York Times scandal you'd expect the media to redouble their efforts to regain the public's trust, and yet they still can't get the most fundamental of political facts correct.

Also, I guess the California Election Committee Whatever is saying that the enormous number of cadidates is making it impossible to prepare all the ballots in time for the October 7th election. That's ridiculous. I mean, at this point all they need is, like, a bunch of California phone books and some stickers.

Thanks for the scan, Joshua
Posted on August 07, 2003 to Politics


His accent is Austrian, not Australian... surprised you didn't call him on that, too (or was that another typo on your part? It's ok, we won't hold it against you.)

Posted by: Karen on August 7, 2003 2:40 PM

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm typo.

Posted by: Matthew on August 7, 2003 2:47 PM

That's ok, I'll still keep reading... :-)

Posted by: Karen on August 7, 2003 2:49 PM

The extra 'al' is for alien.

Posted by: Squidocto on August 7, 2003 2:59 PM

i heard that gary 'different strokes' coleman is also gonna run for calif. gov.
what is the world coming to???

Posted by: Kal on August 7, 2003 5:07 PM

Budget deficit? Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Willis?

Posted by: dr gonzo on August 7, 2003 8:23 PM

oh yeah, and what is more amusing about the Metacritic page is that readers actually defended Jiggly. The title, of course, refers to the infamous booty.

Posted by: dr gonzo on August 7, 2003 8:26 PM

Couldn't they come up with an easier to pronounce title? I know it's supposed to be "Zheely" or whatever, but the number of radio announcers I've heard call it Jiggly is just getting ridiculous.

Jim Rome was bitching about Gary Coleman on his radio show yesterday, he wouldn't shut up about it. I would love to see a debate between Schwarzeneggar and Coleman... just to have the size comparison.

Posted by: Ryan Waddell on August 8, 2003 5:06 AM

Gigli has been given appropriate treatment in the recent Onion article: Gigli Focus Groups Demand New Ending In Which Both Affleck and Lopez Die.

Posted by: Jack Vinson on August 8, 2003 7:30 AM

Funny that you should mention metacritic and Ahnold's political career together. I'd never been to metacritic before, so maybe this is normal for them, but their front page now has a link to reviews of "Governator 3". =)

Posted by: Dugrless on August 8, 2003 7:35 AM

Seriously, man, if I lived in California, I'd vote for Arnie. I was reading an article about it the other day (globe and mail is half decent), and apparently he happens to be running against half of the porn industry...

...A lot worse could happen. A lot worse has happened. I mean, he's not doing it for the money, and things probably couldn't get much worse down there...

Besides, the whole situation is flippin' hillarious. Only in California, man, only in California...

Posted by: Pippi on August 8, 2003 8:15 AM

> Only in California, man, only in California...

You're just jealous!

Posted by: Beerzie Boy on August 8, 2003 8:23 AM

Yeah, there's no challenge in Arnold jokes...like Martha Stewart jokes. But at least we should all be thankful he's nudging Kobe off the headlines.

ENOUGH already.

Posted by: Laurie on August 8, 2003 8:51 AM

I live in BC. If you know anything about the provincial government up here, you'd know I was VERY jelous.

Posted by: Pippi on August 8, 2003 8:53 AM

Wait, you mean he's SERIOUS about running for Governor? I heard about it, but I thought all those people cheering for him on TV last night were from one of those flash mob things.

Posted by: Stacey on August 8, 2003 12:52 PM

*hrm* Cyborg, actually.

Posted by: Ginger on August 11, 2003 9:06 PM


Thank you very much for suggessting me an idea !

Posted by: Gandalf on March 18, 2004 6:33 AM