S.W.A.T.: "SWAT is better than Gigli, but so is most outpatient surgery." -- Mick LaSalle, SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE

Grind: "A movie conceived by monkey-suited honchos who regard their targeted audience as impressionable nincompoops susceptible to every new trend in sports, clothing and music that comes down the pike." -- Scott Foundas, LA WEEKLY

American Wedding: "You'll see better film on ponds." -- Elvis Mitchell, NEW YORK TIMES

Marci X: "This movie is, like, so eight years ago." -- Gene Seymour, LOS ANGELES TIMES

Jeeper Creepers 2: "The kind of limp horror retread whose only saving grace may be that it will inspire legions of budding young screenwriters to say, 'Jesus this sucks. I can do better'." -- Marc Savlov, THE AUSTIN CHRONICLE

Uptown Girl: "A virtual collection of 'What were they thinking?' moments." -- Lou Lumenick, NEW YORK POST

My Boss's Daughter: "Moronic. idiotic. Insulting. Pathetic. But enough with the sweet talk." -- Joe Morgenstern, WALL STREET JOURNAL