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Updates to this blog might be kind of sporadic from now on because I just found out that I'm the pope. I don't really know much about Catholicism, but always figured that popes were elected, or picked by a council, or the next in line just became magically popey when the old one died (like on Buffy The Vampire Slayer). Wrong on all accounts -- apparently my name was selected in a random drawing. I filled out a contest card at a "24 Fitness Gym" a few years ago for a chance to win a trip to Hawaii, but I didn't really read the fine print and was unaware that fourth prize was the papacy.
So anyway, I'll be starting a new job on Monday. It seems like a pretty good gig: I get to run a small country, and I get to tell millions of people what to do, and I get a discount at the Vatican commissary. I have to pay for my own work uniform, though, and that kind of sucks. I have no idea where to buy one of them hats.Posted on April 01, 2005 to dy