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Senate Agrees To Vote On Bolton's Mustache

While John Bolton's confirmation as US ambassador to the United Nations remains uncertain, the senate today agreed to a straight up-or-down vote on the judiciousness of Bolton's mustache. "We have a constitutional duty to advise and consent Presidential nominees," said Susan Collins, R-Maine, one of the six senators who brokered the compromise, "and while we're waiting to consent, we figured we'd take a crack at advising." The vote, originally scheduled for this afternoon, was pushed back to Thursday after a rift opened between the senators advocating an "aggressive trim" and the so-called "Norelco sixty-two" who urge Bolton to make a clean shave of things. "The color doesn't even match his hair," said Sen. Mark Pryor, D-Arkansas, who counts himself squarely in the latter camp. "Does he somehow not know what it looks like?" Thought a vote seems all but inevitable, President George Bush continued to stand by Bolton's mustache, calling it "the right facial hair for the right lip." Also rallying to Bolton's defense was Sen. John McCain, who called the mustache "rather dashing" and is expected to cast the lone vote in favor of its retention in an effort to preserve his reputation as a maverick.

Posted on June 07, 2005 to News