Yesterday morning The Queen and I were both in the bathroom. She was brushing her teeth at one sink; I was shaving at the other and considering my reflection in the mirror.

Me: Okay, I give up. I thought I'd let my hair grow out to a normal length to see if I could do anything with it, but it's impossible. I'm just going to shave it all off again.

Queen: Thank God.

M: Why, do you think it looks bad too?

Q: It looks terrible.

M: Well, c'mon -- it does't look that bad. But I have so many cowlicks that it's hard to --

Q: It looks ridiculous.

M: Hey, I'm saying it doesn't look good . That's my point. So I'm going to shave it -- there's no need for the pile-on. I was growing it out a little bit as an experiment, but --

Q: It's been an ordeal for the whole family.