defective yeti: Take Your Best Shot

Conversation with a fellow dad over drinks:

Me: How old is your son, now?

A: Five and a half.

M: Going into kindergarten next year, then?

A: Yeah. That's kind of a hot topic of debate at our house these days. He's currently going to Montessori, and we have to decide if we're going to put him in public school.

M: Right. And you, bleeding heart liberal that you are, are advocating public schools. Because you want to give your child a ruinous education and score a few cheap political points.

A: Exactly. In fact, that's kind of the problem: the Seattle school system is actually pretty good, so it's not even like we're throwing him to the wolves. It's more like we're throwing him to a bunch of puppies. It doesn't burnish our liberal credentials at all.

M: That's rough, man. Well, look at the bright side: the way things are going, I'm sure the "Indeterminate War On Terror" will still be in full swing 13 years from now. So you can always encourage your son to enroll him in the military after high school, thereby proving some sort of political point or another.

A: Hmm, that's a thought. Of course, if we don't put him in public school he'll probably wind up in a specialized military academy for Montessori graduates. They'll be all, like, "We're not going to tell you who to shoot. Just get out there on the battlefield and express yourself."

We love my daughter's Montessori and ended up keeping her there for Kindergarten. At her birthday party (stocked with other Montessori kids, of course) we witnessed the avoidance of a potential crying fit when one of the children yelled out, "Wait, everyone! Let's use our words and wait our turn!"

This prompted another Montessori dad & me to imagine "Lord of the Flies: Montessori Version" wherein a bunch of kids are stranded on an island and end up creating a stable society that has eliminated conflict and includes universal health care.

Sigh. Lord help her when she has to fend for herself on the playground next year.

Posted by: Dug Steen on April 25, 2006 1:09 PM


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Take Your Best Shot Conversation with a fellow dad over drinks: Me: How old is your son, now? A: Five and a half. M: Going into kindergarten next year, then? A: Yeah. That's kind of a hot topic of debate at our house these days. He's currently going to Montessori, and we have to decide if we're going to put him in public school. M: Right. And you, bleeding heart liberal that you are, are advocating public schools. Because you want to give your child a ruinous education and score a few cheap political points. A: Exactly. In fact, that's kind of the problem: the Seattle school system is actually pretty good, so it's not even like we're throwing him to the wolves. It's more like we're throwing him to a bunch of puppies. It doesn't burnish our liberal credentials at all. M: That's rough, man. Well, look at the bright side: the way things are going, I'm sure the "Indeterminate War On Terror" will still be in full swing 13 years from now. So you can always encourage your son to enroll him in the military after high school, thereby proving some sort of political point or another. A: Hmm, that's a thought. Of course, if we don't put him in public school he'll probably wind up in a specialized military academy for Montessori graduates. They'll be all, like, "We're not going to tell you who to shoot. Just get out there on the battlefield and express yourself." Posted on April 24, 2006 to Conversations, Seattle Comments Owww, my gut hurts and my pants are pissed. Did you shoot beer out of your nose? Just get out there and express yourself... BWAH! Posted by: Polli on April 24, 2006 9:35 PM >"We're not going to tell you who to shoot. Just get out there on the battlefield and express yourself." BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! Posted by: Carny Asada on April 24, 2006 10:02 PM Perfect. Ah, Montessori. Posted by: wenders on April 25, 2006 5:22 AM You mean there's actually another dad out there who's as funny as you are? Posted by: Jay on April 25, 2006 7:36 AM It's true. There's no right or wrong way to shoot the enemy. It's whatever works for you. Posted by: Davey on April 25, 2006 9:09 AM That is brilliant Posted by: Scott aka SRH on April 25, 2006 10:12 AM We love my daughter's Montessori and ended up keeping her there for Kindergarten. At her birthday party (stocked with other Montessori kids, of course) we witnessed the avoidance of a potential crying fit when one of the children yelled out, "Wait, everyone! Let's use our words and wait our turn!" This prompted another Montessori dad & me to imagine "Lord of the Flies: Montessori Version" wherein a bunch of kids are stranded on an island and end up creating a stable society that has eliminated conflict and includes universal health care. Sigh. Lord help her when she has to fend for herself on the playground next year. Posted by: Dug Steen on April 25, 2006 1:09 PM Awesome. Sent to my old army buddy whose mother runs a Montessori. Posted by: Nate on April 26, 2006 9:34 AM "the Seattle school system is actually pretty good" good one, but, please, stop it with the school jokes, you're killing me Posted by: jill on May 4, 2006 4:40 PM It's amazing how you can remember such a long conversation. LOL Posted by: Joey on May 10, 2006 12:57 PM The school is for educating and giving knowledge. The choice of school shouldn't depend on the political view of parents. Posted by: Miron on May 13, 2006 5:00 AM	Home Archive Favorite Posts About Contact Search: Categories: Bad Review Revue, The Books Conversations Games Great Ideas Humor Movies News Observations Politics Squirrelly, The Storytelling Tools and Toys