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Captain Retcon
I've finally discovered my superpower. It wasn't readily apparent, since it alters the entire space/time continuum every time it is activated and essentially erases all traces of its own existence. But I think I have its number. Here's how it works:
I should have realized all this back when I came up with My Big Fat Geek Wedding, an idea so ingenious that it was inconceivable anyone could have thunk it up first. But I just dismissed that as a fluke. Recently, though, the evidence has been mounting. Last week, for instance, I witnessed a friend open a bottle of beer with his wedding ring. "That's pretty cool," I said. "But you know what would even cooler? If someone invented a ring with a bottleopener built into it. The cool part would be if the inventor was me, and I made a million dollars for doing it." And then, a few days later, I was at a stoplight in the middle of a bike ride, and happened to look down: ![]() Okay, see: that's exactly what I'm talking about. Every great idea of mine is retroactively invented. Oh well. Even though I won't personally profit, I guess I can still use my powers for good. For instance, here's a great idea I just now thought up: three Star Wars prequel films that don't totally suck. Woohoo, I'm going to go rent them again now! This time they're going to be awesome!! Update: It appears that my powers do, in fact, have limits. Posted on August 29, 2006 to Great Ideas |
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