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U.S. Capitols Cities, Had All States Followed North Dakota's Example and Named Them After Types of Donuts

Cruller, Alabama
Jelly-Filled, Alaska
Bavarian, Arizona
Apple Fritter, Arkansas
Brown Bobby, California
Sugar, Colorado
Nut Top, Connecticut
Old Fashioned, Delaware
Cheese Danish, Florida
Hush Puppy, Georgia
Malasada, Hawaii
Eclair, Idaho
Frosted, Illinois
Timbits, Indiana
Golden Puff, Iowa
Koeksuster, Kansas
Yum-Yum, Kentucky
Beignet, Louisiana
Buttermilk, Maine
Krafne, Maryland
Boston Cream, Massachusetts
Lassie Loop, Michigan
Cinnamon Twist, Minnesota
Crumb, Mississippi
Maple Bar, Missouri
Bear Claw, Montana
Beaver Tail, Nebraska
Cake, Nevada
Blueberry Crisp, New Hampshire
Berliner, New Jersey
Churro, New Mexico
Devils Food, New York
Zeppole, North Carolina
Raised, Ohio
Elephant Ear, Oklahoma
Pretzel-Shaped, Oregon
Fastnacht, Pennsylvania
Chocolate Log, Rhode Island
Custard, South Carolina
Powdered, South Dakota
Creme Horn, Tennessee
Texan-Style, Texas
Olicook, Utah
Rainbow Sprinkle, Vermont
Paczki, Virginia
Frying Saucers, Washington
Glazed, West Virginia
Pershing, Wisconsin
Hole, Wyoming

Posted on April 17, 2007 to Lists





Comments

You said a mouthful. Interesting to know someone exists who would thoughtfully create such a list. Large Louie

Posted by: Anonymous on April 17, 2007 7:23 PM

Clearly, I need to clearly patronize a better stocked doughnut store clearly.

Posted by: Anonymous on April 17, 2007 8:40 PM

Dude, a hush puppy is not a donut. It is a type of deep fried cornbread.

Yankees. Sheesh!

Posted by: pjcamp on April 17, 2007 8:50 PM

Figures the doughnut police would be here reading your blog rather than keeping me from a doughnut disaster this morning. (Disaster meaning I ate one more than a healthy number of doughnuts.)

Way to go, pjcamp.

Posted by: Anonymous on April 17, 2007 9:12 PM

Paczki should be for Michigan, due to the huge Polish community in Detroit.

Posted by: Jerry Kindall on April 17, 2007 9:59 PM

what kind of fool would live a place named Pretzel-Shaped, Oregon??

Posted by: Alcari on April 18, 2007 1:05 AM

/Homer
Mmmmm... State capitols....
/Homer

Ben
Nut Top, Connecticut

Posted by: Ben on April 18, 2007 5:12 AM

For a moment I thought I had accidentally stumbled upon a list at mcsweeneys.net.

Posted by: Anonymous on April 18, 2007 6:18 AM

Bismarck is a donut?

Posted by: SteveJones on April 18, 2007 7:10 AM

Bismarck is a capital?

Posted by: Ryan on April 18, 2007 7:53 AM

Dang it, what is the capital of North Dakota? I came to the comments section hoping to be enlightened!

Posted by: Diane on April 18, 2007 8:09 AM

Who knew that Tim Horton had so much influence in the great state of Indiana. It's enough to make a Canuck proud eh?

Posted by: heather on April 18, 2007 8:18 AM

Believe me, as a North Dakota native, there is nothing sugary or yummy about Bismarck.

Posted by: Sunny on April 18, 2007 9:25 AM

Remind me not to move to Rhode Island if I am ever transported into your doughnut capital alternat universive.

Posted by: Diablevert on April 18, 2007 9:58 AM

Matt, have you been to Top Pot? Those are awesome donuts.

Posted by: Paul Davis on April 18, 2007 10:55 AM

No, silly, as Mel Brooks told us: Bismarck is a herring :)

Posted by: Trex on April 18, 2007 11:59 AM

I feel as though glazed would have been a much better capital for vermont.

not that, you know, I would know that or anything... I just heard it somewhere... yeah.

Posted by: kt on April 18, 2007 12:31 PM

There is a Sugar Land, TX. Land of Sugar Donuts, perhaps? Though I'd really love to live in Kolache, TX.

Posted by: ladypuppy on April 18, 2007 1:16 PM

Chocolate Log, Rhode Island is a shitty town, glad I left for Nut Top.

Posted by: Jakeismyfakename on April 18, 2007 3:43 PM

Wow, good research--you definitely got the malasadas right. Mmmmmmm.

Posted by: Kim on April 18, 2007 5:02 PM

Bismark is not a donut, it's a type of herring. Can we please have a repeat that is gastronimically accurate?

Posted by: Philip on April 19, 2007 2:16 AM

From dictionary.com:
bismark

noun
a raised doughnut filled with jelly or jam [syn: Berlin doughnut]

Posted by: Nikki on April 19, 2007 6:28 AM

If you want to be picky and keep the 'c' in Bismarck:

Bis·marck /ˈbɪzmɑrk; for 1 also Ger. ˈbɪsmɑrk/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[biz-mahrk; for 1 also Ger. bis-mahrk] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun
1. Ot·to von /ˈɒtoʊ vɒn; Ger. ˈɔtoʊ fən/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[ot-oh von; Ger. aw-toh fuhn] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation, 1815–98, German statesman: first chancellor of modern German Empire 1871–90.
2. a city in and the capital of North Dakota, in the central part. 44,485.
3. (often lowercase)
a. Chiefly Northern U.S. a jelly doughnut.
b. Chiefly Midland U.S. a fried cruller.


With or without the 'c' (or even as a state capitol) it's still more tasty than herring.

Posted by: Nikki on April 19, 2007 6:32 AM

North Carolina is the home of Krispy Kreme, and we get stuck with Zeppole?

I'm outraged! Where's Al Sharpotn when you need him?

Posted by: Dan Isaacs on April 20, 2007 5:37 AM

As a resident of the great state of Ohio, I too believe that our state should be razed.

Posted by: JMT on April 20, 2007 5:44 PM

You're the #1 google hit for Lassie Loop, and the only hit for "lassie loop". 'the hell's a Lassie Loop?

Posted by: j on April 20, 2007 6:14 PM

What on earth is a Brown Bobbie and how is it related to California? I live an hour from there and I've never heard of it.

Now, we have had two governors with the last name of Brown, Edmond and his son Jerry, but that was a long time ago.

Posted by: Calichef on April 21, 2007 6:39 AM

Timbits, Indiana? We don't even have a Tim Horton's here.

Posted by: Jason on April 23, 2007 7:56 AM

Is Baked, Alaska too far from pastry?

Posted by: Marc Maurer on April 23, 2007 12:09 PM

Um, yup Old Fashioned, Delaware's about right. Lightly fried, almost tasteless, and begging to be smothered. Guess that would make our biggest town something equally bland and boring, say, Vegetable Broth, De or Plain Oatmeal, De. Boy, Matt, you sure did open up a whole new can of creamed corn on this one.

Posted by: mindar76 on April 29, 2007 7:03 AM